Tales of the Cocktail 2012 banner

From the category archives:

Kitchen Porn

Diamond Juice

by Jacob Galbraith 01.04.2010

I hate my own cooking. It wasn’t always this way; in the beginning I loved everything that I made, regardless of how disgusting it was. After six years of assaulting my unsuspecting palate with countless taste tests, it is extremely difficult to find merit in anything that I cook. Not because it isn’t any good, [...]

8 comments Click to continue…

A Christmas Story

by Jacob Galbraith 12.17.2009

I work in a great restaurant, but i haven’t always been so fortunate. My ascent from places that merely existed to ones that thrive has been a six year journey littered with highs and lows. The past few years I’ve been lucky enough to have a few days off surrounding the Christmas holiday. In years [...]

4 comments Click to continue…

Missing Out

by Jacob Galbraith 12.02.2009

I often think about the things that I would say to a soon to be cook if given the opportunity. I’d probably start the party by showing them my open wounds, followed by the collection of awfulness that has gathered underneath my fingernails. If they care to hang around afterwards, I’d probably ask them one [...]

7 comments Click to continue…

The Kitchen as an Office

by Jacob Galbraith 11.19.2009

Some days in the kitchen are downright awful, looking more like the first few rounds of a Rocky fight stretched across ten hours, which is basically The Passion Of The Christ. I’m not saying we’re Jesus or anything like that, I’m saying we’re Jim Cavaziel as Jesus. It’s different.  Anyways, I sometimes find solace in [...]

3 comments Click to continue…

This Little Piggy

by Jacob Galbraith 11.09.2009

Growing up, the household’s acquisition of a carton of ice cream meant that after dinner, the container would be divided into four and then savagely devoured by the family. A dozen donuts picked up on the way home were often dealt with the same manner: 3 each, with the possibility of dear old dad nabbing [...]

2 comments Click to continue…

Pastry Bitch

by Jacob Galbraith 10.22.2009

I’m not entirely sure how it happened, but over the course of the past few years I’ve found myself spending more and more time standing in front of huge bins of flour and sugar. I once fancied myself a completely one-dimensional meat cook, completely unwilling to step outside of the delicious and savoury box that [...]

4 comments Click to continue…

Staff Meal

by Jacob Galbraith 10.15.2009

For as long as there have been professional kitchens, there have been industrial quantities of trim and scrap. Sometimes these bits manage to make their way onto the menu (see: boulliabase), but more often than not they wind up being enjoyed by the kitchen crew as staff meal. I spent about three years on the [...]

6 comments Click to continue…

No Money. No Problems.

by Jacob Galbraith 09.24.2009

Without fail, whenever I tell people that I’m a cook I hear any combination of “oooh”/”ahhh” from whoever I’ve just broken the news to. They’re excited, and I can almost hear the wheels turning in their heads. They’re referring to everything they’ve learned from the Food Network, imagining exquisite meals that I’ve made for decadent [...]

4 comments Click to continue…

Dear You

by Jacob Galbraith 09.17.2009

Without you I’d be standing on a curb somewhere holding a sign that says “will cook for work”. I’m looking at you, customers.  What we have here is a sort of Stockholm Syndrome;  you keep me from my loved ones and the light of day, yet i continue to go back for more… approximately 6 [...]

14 comments Click to continue…

Jacob Galbraith

by Editor 08.01.2009

A Brief History Of This Young Line Cook
Jake Galbraith, born Jacob but later shortened for ease of shouting, was born and raised on Vancouver Island.  Fresh out of high school and genuinely aimless he found himself in the dish pit at a fancy shmancy resort.  It took about 8 seconds of doing the dishes to [...]

0 comments Click to continue…

Next Entries →